You are deliberate about building the career and life you want, but what about dating? Swiping not working out? Three Day Rule blends algorithms with matchmakers.
Meet Talia Goldstein a boss and mentor, the founder of Three Day Rule Matchmaking. Three Day Rule is a modern, personalized matchmaking company with matchmakers all over the US. Goldstein started TDR 8 years ago and has truly scaled matchmaking with a level of quality that no one else in the industry has achieved. Three Day Rule has an incredible, female-lead team that inspires us every day.
TDR is different because of its hybrid approach, combining technology with in-person vetting, said Talia Goldstein.
“We meet all of our matches in person, so we’re making curated introductions based on off-paper qualities rather than on-paper stats,” she explained. “We’re able to make introductions between two people who might normally swipe right past each other on an app based on something as trivial as height or age range, which allows for a ton of new opportunities.”
Now more than ever, we’re impressed with what they’ve done. When things started to shut down across the US in March, Goldstein and her team weren’t sure how the dating industry would be impacted. They’re proud to say that Goldstein has navigated them through sometimes bumpy waters, has innovated and adapted to not only survive, but thrive in these past few months of life during Pandemic.
Goldstein’s matchmaking business has helped more people date than ever before, and are providing hope to so many singles during what could be a very lonely time.
Goldstein explains the process in detail here:
“We start off by using a proprietary matching algorithm to recommend a list of top potential matches in our database for each client. Then, our matchmakers review each of the top contenders and curate the ones that they think would be the best matches for our clients and vet them in person. After the in-person vetting process, our matchmakers will only introduce the most compatible matches to our clients. After each date, our matchmaker will gather post-date feedback from both parties to determine how the date went and share valuable insights with our client.”
Can you give us an idea of who your clients are?
Our clients are successful, busy professionals looking for a committed relationship. They’re social, educated, independent, savvy. Bottom line: they’re catches. They’re mostly people who have no problem getting dates on their own, but would prefer not to spend time on the wrong dates. They love the idea of having a gatekeeper who sends them on fewer better dates.
Tell us a little about yourself and your business. Why did you select it and how did you get started?
I started this business while working as a TV Producer at E! Entertainment. Everyone around me was single. For fun, I would sit in my cubicle and dish out relationship advice. I started matching my co-workers and friends and pairing up some interesting combinations and it worked. Many people that I matched were committing, getting engaged and later married. I knew I had a knack for matchmaking so I decided to do it at scale. I hosted events around LA with some of the most impressive singles and they were a hit. We had 600 people are some of these events! I recognized that something was missing in the market so I quit my job in TV and started a matchmaking company. Today, we’re in 10 cities across the country and have matched thousands of singles!
What are some of your favorite things about what you do?
I’m 10 years in and love the job just as much as in the early days. One of the coolest parts of the job is that I’m constantly surprised and challenged — and a decade in, I’m still learning something new every day. It’s never boring. And, of course, there are few things more rewarding than to guide people on their dating journey, encourage them to get out of their own way, and help them navigate the beginning stages of dating. It’s also an added bonus to be able to attend their weddings!
I’m also grateful to work with the most incredible team. I’m continuing to learn from the matchmakers on my team and it’s so fun to celebrate all of their successes on a weekly basis.
What are some challenges of this business?
It’s challenging to speak with singles who are making the same mistakes over and over but are not ready to take the leap and work with a matchmaker. I know we can change their lives and we’re so excited to work with them but we can’t make someone ready to find love and change habits so that part is particularly frustrating for me. The good news is, usually, that once our clients are receptive to help, matchmakers are able to make tiny micro-tweaks that end up extremely game-changing.
What is your dating philosophy / what is some dating advice you have for our readers?
The best advice I could give is to be open-minded. A decade in this business and I can tell you, more times than not, our success stories are between two people who weren’t perfect on paper. The more boxes singles create on their check-lists, the more difficult it is to find a person who intangibly might be a great fit even if they don’t check all the boxes. I tell clients to embrace the “coulds” in a future partner rather than the “shoulds”.
Why are people, that should have it easier because of their success and status, having a hard time finding love?
Our clients are for the most part successful in all aspects of their life except for love. It’s true that many people at the top of their field have trouble dating — and I could go on and on about why. The bottom line is though that many people of success and status feel they’ve worked incredibly hard to make their own professional fate. They feel they deserve someone who is equally as accomplished, but again, good on paper doesn’t necessarily mean good for you. They have tendencies to look for perfection in a partner because of the success they’ve achieved outside of their love life.
The other big challenge here is that they tend to be extremely busy. Like anything else worth achieving in life, it requires a certain amount of time, energy and attention. The issue is, these successful singles view time as a commodity that they just don’t have, and so dating winds up on the bottom of their priority list. It needs to be treated as a job of sorts, which is no fun. That’s why they hire Three Day Rule.
What is the success-story you are most proud of?
The stories that I am most proud of are the couples who absolutely wouldn’t have met without Three Day Rule. They would have swiped right past their soulmate on an app. In fact, nearly half of our success stories ended up with someone a little outside of their criteria. I love opening up people’s minds and helping them realize that their person might be coming in a different package than they expect. An example of this, one of my first clients was a woman in her 30’s, absolutely adorable, intelligent (went to Harvard), successful. She wanted a Jewish guy who was definitely not in the entertainment industry (from experience). After multiple conversations, I realized that religion actually wasn’t that important to her and she had limited beliefs about men in entertainment. I matched her with a Catholic film producer and they are now married with twins. She couldn’t be happier!
What has been the most surreal moment of your career so far?
I always it find it surreal attending client weddings. Day to day this is my job and it’s fast-paced and I love it. I rarely take time to slow down and think about how impactful the work we do really is. When I’m at a client’s wedding and I realize that nobody would be attending the wedding if it wasn’t for Three Day Rule it’s pretty surreal. I don’t take the magnitude of my day job lightly.
Advice for other entrepreneurs who want to get started or are just starting out?
It’s only worth it if it’s fun. Entrepreneurship is a lot of work and a rollercoaster of emotions so you should pick a company that you are actually passionate about because it’s only worth all of the hard work and sleepless nights if you are working on something you love.
Anything else you would like to tell us about your business?
It’s easy to sign up, and there are membership levels for any commitment-minded single. Go to ThreeDayRule.com and fill out a profile. It will take 2 minutes. From there, you will have the opportunity to meet with a matchmaker and tell her all about yourself and your search. Sometimes that conversation alone can be helpful so absolutely worth taking the meeting. To be in our database is free (but passive), and to become a premium member is a step towards meeting fewer, better dates to set you on your way to a relationship.
![From Music to Perfume: How did your background as a music teacher influence your transition into perfumery, and how do you incorporate your musical sensibilities into creating fragrances? I’ve always thought in terms of metaphors, and music has many that can be related to perfumery! Beyond just thinking in terms of top, middle and base notes [soprano/alto/tenor in choir], I approach each fragrant idea as a composition. When documenting my ideas, song structures often come to mind. As the scent brief is visited, I meditate on what the fragrance should convey - do I want to create an accord or a “chord” of fragrance note combinations? Do I want an a capella soloist (a particular ingredient to stand out more than others?) Many of my thoughts regarding song composition transfers to my scent formulation process, with me treating each note as an intentional soliloquy at some point.
Brand Origin: What inspired you to start Pink MahogHany in 2005, and how has your vision for the brand evolved since its inception?
An avid lover of all things pleasantly scented (with slight modesty), looking back in retrospect, it’s no huge surprise that I’ve created an indie perfume house with just an idea to provide unique options for those who may be sensitive to unnecessary pungency. Initially, I just wanted to evaluate various blends to note their aroma profiles when “played” together…it wasn’t until I had friends and family asking if I knew of brands that catered to those who may be on the more olfactory sensitive side, that I really began to take my research more seriously. In the almost 20 years that Pink MahogHany has been in existence, our micro visions for the brand have evolved to larger territory. Where Pink MahogHany used to only be a personal brand, we are now also a bespoke formulation service provider to other indie brands seeking unique fragrance offerings for their products. These products range from (but are not limited to) perfumes, candles, body butters and lip balms. Ingredient Transparency: You emphasize transparency and the use of desirable ingredients in your products. How do you select your ingredients, and what challenges have you faced in maintaining this standard?
Being an indie brand often comes with a set of assumptions and misconceptions - one of them being more negative than positive as it relates to ingredients used. There is a lot of “fluff” in the industry with labeling falsification. Because fragrance formulas are a trade secret, not every molecular breakdown of a material has to be noted on the ingredient label (it would be incredibly long), but we at Pink MahogHany™️ adhere strongly to the IFRA [International Fragrance Regulatory Association] regulations that state for common and potential allergens to be listed on our ingredient label. We’ve taken this a step further to also include these ingredients listed on our website to promote further transparency, all while protecting our intellectual property. Unfortunately, we’ve had companies to unethically sell lesser expensive “dupes” of our artisan perfumes, so as a way to create a better authenticity stamp, we make it our duty to be honest about our claims. If our perfume says “Rose Bulgaria”, it is in fact just that and not a component of rose being passed off as the source material. Collaborations and Custom Scents: Can you share more about your work with private label clients? What excites you most about creating custom scent solutions for other indie brands? I could easily sum this up in one word and say “Funding.” True, there is money out there, but I’m always thinking outside the box. Having a program that has an “Each One Fund One” mentality doesn’t exist (that I’ve been made aware of). Bootstrapping can be quite the challenge, even when you’ve reached the 6-figure mark annually. Competition to be seen and set apart is extremely high, so having quality packaging and branding is a must. There are lots of factors to consider, though when desiring to make upgrades. If there were a unique, tier-geared funding operation available, it would help perfume brands offset packaging and bulk material costs in the beginning stages.
Industry Challenges: What are some of the biggest challenges you've faced as an independent fragrance house, and how have you overcome them to grow your brand? As the brand continues on the path of organic growth, I would like to expand our reach into schools, offering perfumery as an arts elective for middle and high school. I’d love to partner with botanists, farmers and horticulturists directly to grow and source raw materials for the students to work with in the creation of tinctures. My passion is getting back to nature as best as possible, as nature was my first “scent experience” as a child. We would also love to witness our fragrance creations being used to scent model homes, our focus diffuser blends being used in automobile dealerships as well as partner with Air Bnb and boutique hotels that specialize in highlighting minority, indie brands. Personal Journey: How has your personal experience, particularly as a divorced mother and someone who has experienced the loss of a child, shaped your approach to life and your work in perfumery?
Because I homeschool my twin sons, we are together a lot more than most, so one thing we all do is have moments of sharing where a neutral “floor” is laid to converse about anything. Though they are quite communicative by nature, I realize that sometimes I can be in work mode so much that it spills over into what should be our quality time. My sons see the authentic me and learn how to communicate through seeing authenticity. I’ve learned not to feel as if I have to be the epitome of perfection but allow them to see my imperfections vulnerably but with discernment. Having had two traumatic experiences pretty close together has taught me how to truly slow down and enjoy the simplicities of life - igniting a spiritual aspect that I’ve always carried but never fully explored…until Kenji’s sudden passing (2018.) Grief has a way of catapulting us into a quest for more meaningfulness in both life and business. After Kenji’s passing and my processing through the initial stages of grief, I was able to incorporate our spiritual bond into Pink MahogHany by way of essential oil diffuser blends for both focus and sleep and most recently aromatic perfume elixirs. It’s been quite the process channeling the void of his physical presence, but I also have peace knowing he can be honored in a great way through scent. I noticed once I began to be more open and receptive to spiritual signs, synchs and “winks”, more ideas began to flow. It’s been this way since his transition. Emotional Expression: Fragrance is often tied to memories and emotions. How does your personal life influence the fragrances you create, and do you have a particular scent that holds special meaning to you? My creative process is much more alchemic now, and I include Kenji by talking out loud to him, believe it or not. I’m a firm believer that when our loved ones transition from the physical plane, they are still present - just in another form. I choose to keep his memory alive by not pretending he never existed (even if for a brief period of time). I am working (slowly) on a book and accompanying fragrance, but I know it will require me to revisit some memories I’m not quite ready for, so until then, his big brothers will launch their debut fragrance, The Peaceful Tiger (they chose the name.) I’ve learned that even in what we consider “small things”, our transitioned loved ones want to be recognized and acknowledged. When the twins and I designed their fragrance label (with a designer out of the country that didn’t know anything about me personally), we had issues with the graphic - so much so that the designer asked if they could rework the design. When they sent the proof for approval, the Tiger was not only younger but sleeping, with an uncanny, angelic resemblance to baby Kenji! Becoming more aware and being more sensitive to my intention for launching a fragrance has definitely made room for more divine situations like these to occur. Healing Through Scent: In what ways has creating fragrances been a form of healing or expression for you, especially after the loss of your son, Kenji Mwamba? I know my sons may not necessarily want to be perfumers, but they definitely have an entrepreneurial heart. My desire is that whatever they decide to pursue (acting, script-writing, music or architecture), they know that anything is possible with the right amount of determination, grit, belief and immersion. One reason I chose to homeschool is so they could enjoy learning without restraint and have ample time to devote to their own separate passions and it still be fun. They know Pink MahogHany is theirs if they want it (many, many years from now - lol), and we are already discussing business structures for whatever they choose their role to be once I retire. Work-Life Balance: How do you find balance between your professional responsibilities and personal well-being, and what self-care practices do you prioritize? I’m not just a perfumer; I’m also a consumer, and self-care is huge for me. I often take salt baths to reset my energy and clear my mind after being around large groups of people or free a long day. I’m a habitual perfume sampler, and I have so many to choose from to wear as my “nightcap.” Even if just for 10-15 minutes, I cherish each moment I’m able to have some “me-time.” When time and co-parenting schedules permit, I’m definitely on a flight somewhere to indulge in some delicious food and mouth-watering mocktails!](https://www.womenontopp.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/IMG_3812-1200x720.jpeg)
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